this was awhile ago… a few weeks, maybe. but here’s some pictures of a meeting with graphic designer and friend, coley graf. we went up to her new house in cold spring and hung out/ talked design stuff for the album.
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she’s showing me an example of the kind of packaging i want, and how the content is all put together. (that is jenn friedman’s album, by the way, which coley also did the design for.)
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we drank absinthe.
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and relaxed.
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and read books.
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and uh… yeah. this is a real human skeleton. coley and her fiance, john, have stuff like this all over their house.
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and at the end she read my tarot! each card represents a month. for the most part, it will be an inspiring and creative year for me. yay!
i’ve really been putting off writing about dayjobs in here. i have a secret fear that some boss will find this and realease me of my duties to their company; little ant workers like me are supposed to give the impression that they LOVE the work that they do. and i’m good at letting my superiors think that.
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but truth? well… most of the time, i don’t hate it. i’d rather be doing something else. something more creative. it depletes me of necessary energy (especially of my line of work, temping, where i basically have to learn a new job every week) to do other things relevant to my “other career,” aka music. actually, this week my nights haven’t been spent doing productive venue-searches, emailing, and uploading, like a good independent musican “should,” but have been soaked in red wine, cold medicine, and csi reruns (don’t try this at home, kids!), just do drown out the stress of the day so that i can get some actual sleep.
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i always feel bad about goin m.i.a. for long periods of time from all my little sites… myspace, my blog, flickr, etc. but quite franky, my day job has been eating my soul lately. and not only have i given up on social networking in the last two weeks, i’ve also had to hold off on/ quit some little projects going on in real life, too. and that makes me sad. but i guess that’s the good thing about temping… it’s only temporary, right?
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are you a musician/ artist/ writer/ etc.? do you have a dayjob, or do you make at least some part of your living off your art? if with dayjob, do how the fuck do you handle doing both? because it’s always been really hard for me. if you do make a significant portion of $ from art, any tips for a n00b like me? (well… i’m not exactly a n00b at music, just at making a living with it.)
i admit it. sometimes, i watch crap television. usually i don’t watch any television, but we recently got a slingbox. so now i indulge if i’m bored/ stressed.
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so there i was in the midst of an unspectacular lifetime movie (ya i know. shutup.), when a commercial for bounce came on, and it had a cute little ditty going on in the background. for kicks i googled the lyrics, and came up with its equally cute little canadian singer, emily mover.
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she has experience as a jazz singer, and you could guess that within her first few notes. the tone of her voice is silky, even, and rich. it feels lovely against the backdrop of her songs — some of which are fully orchestrated affairs, and some totally stripped down. i also think that elements of the production conjures an old vintage feel to it. but with a newness mixed in at the same time. my favorite track is “mountainside” — she manages to make it sound so lush, even with nothing but acoustic guitar and voice.
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i’ll be downloading her so hard once i have the time/ money. note to self: watch more lifetime movies in order to discover new and interesting singers.
here are some pictures from a few weeks ago. while these pictures have nothing to do with music, they have to do with me. and i make music. and since i’ve gotten my new camera, i’ve decided i want to post some pictures about my day-to-day living. then when i get too embarrassed about it, or someone makes some negative comment, i’ll lock/ edit/ delete everything. like always
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roberta’s pizza. empty on a saturday afternoon. it’s a 5 minute walk from my house here in bushwick. jessica, chris, matt, and i went for lunch.
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jessica and i. (and max, my cat) i’m ready to conk out in this picture.
okay, so it’s really hard for me to keep up on all this social networking stuff sometimes. i enjoy it. i wish i could be better at it. but i feel too overwhelmed by other things in my life to do a decent job at it. i am a person who gets excited by projects easily, then abandons said projects when something else excites me more. then i have a pile of 50 uncompleted projects to finish. then i have a panic attack. haha.
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i will also say this about myself- it’s hard for me to differentiate what is too personal to write about. this is such a problem for me, that i fight with myself about it, and most times don’t end up writing anything for fear of leaking things i’ll later regret saying. sometimes, what i have to say can be very scathing and bitchy. because that is just the tone of my writing if i’m in a bad mood, which is when i tend to write the most. it’s bitten me in the ass a good number of times, the most recent incident causing me to permanently lock my personal online journal.
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also, i just tend to get discouraged with, or bored by certain sites ( like myspace), so i tend to only care about them in an on-and-off fashion.
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then i look at people like julia allison, who i’ve never heard of before i read that article, who lives her entire life online. it makes me wonder what the best strategy really is for being successful at this little online game? to be an enigma or bare it all? sure, people like to be voyeurs. and she gets attention, but people hate her for it. and shit, i’ll admit it, i’ve got a really thin skin– there’s no WAY i could take criticism like the kind she gets (i know, musician is the wrong line of work to be in if i can’t take criticism, aye?) i just want to be able to share things about myself without going to that extreme. but is it possible?
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i’ve been thinking about this lately, because as musicians, it’s up to us to find fans and keep them interested. part of that is doing things like blogging, and twitter, and all that other crap. i want to be able to just write whateverthehell i want, but i can’t. what can i say, i’ve got a dirty mind or not just that, but an angry mind… a scared mind. or just an overreactive-and-prone-to-post-when-i’m-emotional mind. aside from the dirty part, i’m not sure these are the best things to try and reel people in with. and i’m not sure unflattering character flaws are the best things for random people to know about other random people, anyway.
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still, there’s always that urge to want to blab everything about onesself, even if it makes us feel vulnerable… then inevitably delete/ edit/ lock what was written out of embarassment. it’s what i always do.
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in conclusion, i don’t know what the anwer is. i guess it’s different for each one of us.
i’ve been totally geeking out on obscure early 90’s r&b and pop music in the last few days, mostly because of this jezebel article. yes, while some of my contemporaries were discovering the beatles and zepplin at such a tender age, i was memorizing the dance to “if”, by janet jackson. i had recorded the video on our vcr… pause, rewind, play… pause, rewind, play… wondering how i could be like her. how i could be that sexy, and attract the attentions of the popular boys at school.
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i’ve always felt ashamed of my love of lame pop and r&b, being around so many music elitists over the last few years… until now. through the article, i see that other smart ladies my age loved the same stuff!! i feel so validated.
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well, it’s bringing back a lot of memories. i’ve been frantically downloading since saturday. listening to the songs, i almost feel like i’m back there – i’m instantly a 12-year-old again. walking around memories in my mind that i’ve linked with a particular song. isn’t it awesome how music does that? it’s a fountain of youth and a time machine.
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so, i’m going to share some of my favorite lame songs with you, via youtube, and tell some memories that i have associated with them. also, i will add that through the course of finding these videos, it was kind of hard to find ones that didn’t disable embedding.
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“fantasy” – mariah carey
if you were any girl growing up at any time in the 1990’s, you pretty much wanted to be mariah carey. this should make it the least embarrassing installment. however, it is still embarrassing to me, because i was that girl x100. every year, i would sing a mariah carey song in the school talent shows, regardless if i sounded good or not. of course i never practiced and refused vocal lessons, i was just convinced that if you were naturally good like her, you shouldn’t HAVE to practice! lol. (i still know people who think like this as adults.) i feel like subscribing to that thinking, and seeing its subsequent failures, is where i got my stage fright from. i always think i won’t do well before a performance, to this day. but she was my favorite for a long, long time, and i still feel like some traces of my vocal style are derived from her.
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the afforementioned “if” – janet jackson
i had a sick obsession with this song and video… it’s fucking awesome! it takes place in some sort of “futuristic” asian sex club. i’m soooo glad i found this version on youtube, because i remember they used to play this one on mtv all the time at first, then they switched to an all-dance version. this made it easier for me to learn the dance moves, but aggravated me because i missed the one with the sex-club storyline. i’ve never been able to find it until now! i wonder why they changed it? but anyway, i still remember/ can do the majority of the dance from this song. don’t test me.
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“too many walls” – cathy dennis
NOW we’re getting into the dirt a little. okay, so cathy dennis was never really a favorite growing up. but i find that listening to songs like “touch me” and “just another dream” now in life is really satisfying. they remind me of the time period of the early 90’s. not really being there, but just the idea of it. i think part of that is because these songs are often included in montages for things (shows, products) associated with the early 90’s. c.d. also remind me of beverly hills 90210 (which i loooved, but only the episodes with brenda in them), because she played at one of their proms or something.
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with this song of hers, though, it’s different. it reminds me of a very specific time of living on the poor side of town with my family. those years were probably some of the best of my life, despite the view that poverty always equals unhappiness. my parents were always around, and i was still young enough to like that fact. i remember my mom woke me up at night once, because this song came on the radio. she knew that i loved it but didn’t get to hear it often; it wasn’t played that much. also for some reason, we always thought it was tara kemp that sang it, and i just discovered yesterday that it was, in fact, cathy dennis.
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“finally” – ce ce peniston
omg, i HATE this version of this song, but stupid universal music doesn’t allow embedding of the normal one. go here if you want to hear the good version. but yeah! this song is FUCKING AMAZING, okay? i remember singing it with jillian harrison in 7th grade, while waiting in the gym for school to start. btw, why did they do that? they used to pile us into the gym, like cattle, until we could be directed to our classrooms. they didn’t just allow us to go to class ourselves. but yeah, so many good memories associated with this song. it’s a classic.
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“i wanna sex u up” – color me badd
alright, i’m just gonna put it out there. i love this song. i don’t even think i have any specific memories of it, or that i even liked it overly much back then. i think even when i was 11 i thought these guys were lame. but this is just a great, lame song. highlights include “we can do it till we both wake up,” and “making love until we drown.”
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“i wanna love you down” – jade
i gotta tell you guys, this was my ULTIMATE jam in 7th grade. i remember listening to q105 (the local radio station) for weeks – WEEKS waiting for it to play. the day it finally did, i scrambled my ass to the tape player and hit record as fast as i could. i think i still have that mix tape. i’d play it over and over. it reminded me of jacob lamb, a boy who i was desperately in love with – just the first of many unavailable boys over the years that i’d form an obsession over, and never actually consummate anything with.
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“knockin the boots” – h town
on the same mix-tape of “love you down,” brings back the same feeling… having a growing interest in sex, but stuck in my room, listening to songs about it rather than going out on dates. i had this notion that everyone else was out there, having this big life, having boyfriends, kissing, doing all these verboten things, and i wasn’t. wtf. we were 12. it couldn’t have been that exciting.
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“every heartbeat” – amy grant
pure popness. so catchy. check out that huge shirt! she’s a total geek in this video, but i remember thinking she was really cool and relating to her. it reminds me, again, of the time living on the poor side of town. there were 2 other families in the apartment building that we were all friends with. there were tons of kids down the street that we would ride bikes with. i would make up dances and teach them to the other girls. i remember one time, we had the most gigantic game of manhunt EVAR. i was really sad when we moved away.
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i could go on and on forever with these. i’ve unearthed so many gems in the past few days. in fact, if anyone wants me to make them a giant early 90’s mix tape and send it to them, i’d be glad to.
we’ve all heard that dumb term. “singer-songwriter.” can it be any more vague? this is how i’m forced to describe myself when someone asks at some party, “ohhhh! so you’re a musicccian! what instrument do you plaaayyy? what kind of music do you doooo?”
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on one hand, it leaves absolutely everything to the imagination. it can mean any number of things, since anyone who writes a song and then sings it, could then be considered a singer-songwriter. it doesn’t matter if you make r&b, power-pop, punk, or industrial grindthrashcxre. now that i think about it, this is a term that should be celebrated for its diversity.
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instead, however, anytime you mention the words “singer” and “songwriter” in the same sentence, people automatically raise a leery eyebrow and assume some stereotype of beatniks singing self-indulgent lyrics in a coffeehouse. if you’re a girl and play guitar, there’s usually some variation of ani difranco involved, as well.
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what’s the deal, people? is it just the human mind’s tendency to categorize things? well the stereotypes are damn annoying. i feel like folks are stuck in the 1990’s version of the wikipedia page i just posted above.
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maybe it’s because we haven’t had a very strong movement of them since the 90’s? oh sure, everybody just can’t get enough of little darling regina spektor. and feist is rather fetching. but a whole movement? a woodstock? a lilith fair? hasn’t transpired in awhile.
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i think people’s opinions haven’t changed because there’s nothing fresh on their mind. but not for lack of trying. i won’t deny that there’s there’s totally goings on in the realm of independent/ d.i.y. musicians. for instance, in brooklyn there’s jezebel, and local correspondents. both are vehicles specifically designed for singer-songwriters. they find artists they like and promote them for FREE. this is huge, even though i, myself haven’t magaged to wrangle their attentions.
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also i hear in l.a. the whole hotel cafe scene is buzzing. from what i gather, it’s a venue that picks out high-quality performers, many who are on the path of successful careers, whose music has been featured on television shows and commercials. they even have a national tour which, based on its amount of sold out shows, has proven to be popular.
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another trend is the tons of little apartment venues that are are opening up. the words out: people are sick of going to some gross dive bar in manhattan, to pay a $15 cover, buy a $5 pbr, then waiting it out through some shitty band on a shitty sound system, just to see your friends perform for like 20 minutes, while rude drunks talk through their songs. (i have had experiences like this as both a performer and a spectator.) why do that when you can go to a friend’s house, pay a $3-$5 cover, buy a $2 beer or bring your own, and see an amazing show in an authentic, intimate environment?
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to my knowlege, in my neighborhood alone theres brooklyn cat house, brooklyn tea party, john bosch, market hotel, and silent barn. in fact, it’s occurring all across america, and doesn’t only benefit the singer-songwriter, but anyone who desires to be heard, and does not desire to go through traditional venues. places like these help out the musician/ band who has no other outlet.
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new music is leaking out the cracks everywhere. and i think that’s totally awesome and beneficial. but still — it’s no mainstream movement… yet. i sort of think a new one’s just around the corner. what evidence to i have to back that claim up? none, really. just a hunch. and the knowledge that the frilly, escapist music of recent times has worn out its welcome, and something has got fill its place sooner or later.
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then again, maybe we don’t want another mainstream movement. maybe singer-songwriters are fine just the way they are now, thankyouverymuch, with thier indie-ness and d.i.y. ethics. but darnitt, it would sure give the image of one a makeover, and then people at parties would be more convenient for me to conversate with.
hello, folks. name’s chantilly. i write songs and sing them. i live in brooklyn, ny.
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i like blogging. though admittedly, i don’t read many blogs except for friends’ personal ones. i’m starting this as an effort to help keep myself thinking. to keep me engaged, in hopes others might find what i write interesting as well. i hope to have pictures and maybe videos once i get a non-shitty camera.
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some things this blog will be:
*updates on how things are going in chantilly’s musicland
*personal struggles and gains as an artist living in new york city
*intelligent musical commentary
*local happenings (i reside in bushwick, brooklyn)
*ranting (it’s inevitable)
*basically whatever i feel like, so long as it has to do with any aspect of any kind music and/ or any issues surrounding it. this includes classical opera, jazz quartets, the mariachi band on the 6 train, top 40 pop, freak folk… you get my drift. anything that inspires, or causes me to have a thought.
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some things this blog will not be:
*pretentious hipster crap
*a personality-less promotional tool for myself
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in short, i hope to make this a chronicle of music and my experiences with it.
or not just that, but an angry mind… a scared mind. or just an overreactive-and-prone-to-post-when-i’m-emotional mind. aside from the dirty part, i’m not sure these are the best things to try and reel people in with. and i’m not sure unflattering character flaws are the best things for random people to know about other random people, anyway.
